Tittytonka

Vagrant Correspondent Yeaux Michel scratches another missive onto your boxcar.


People always ask me what my favorite part of traveling is. I usually tell them how nice it is not being approached by random people always asking stupid questions. Then we laugh a good hearty laugh, and I sneak away while they clutch their sides from laugh cramps. If I time it right, I don't even have to stop walking during all this. Jokes are all about timing. That's what they say, at least. When I remember who "they" are, I'll refer you to "them." I keep thinking it's Gallagher, but that's probably just because I just think about Gallagher a lot.


I'm bad at the "favorite ____" game--almost as bad as I am at the "would you rather" game. I don't feel so bad about this though, because they're both pretty stupid as far as games go, and no one wants to be good at a stupid game. Like curling, for example: does anyone actually aspire to be good at curling? They just fall into it, like a hole. Or janitorial services. Anyway, naming a favorite thing does take a lot less time than naming all the things you like a lot, I'll give it that. But just that. For brevity's sake, I'll just relate one thing I really like about country-hopping, and that one thing is TV.


That's right, you caught what I threw: TV. Television. The Talk Box. Before you do your own hopping up onto your horse and pass down judgment from upon high, let me just say I'm not talking just any TV here, I'm talking foreign TV. How stupid awesome are foreign TV shows? Really stupid awesome, if you didn't know, which probably means you want to join the curling team. American shows would be so much better if I couldn't understand anything anyone said beyond "cat," "what," and "bathroom." Nothing is quite as comforting as not knowing what the hell is going on.


Now it's not all milkshakes and marshmallows on the foreign broadcast, mind you, but if only .5% of TV you can find outside the US is even close to as riveting as this, I'd say that's 10,000 pesos well spent. This is tits down the best programming you're gonna find anywhere, made even more historically significant by the fact that it's probably the first time that North America has made Latin America blush.