You Have a Lot to Learn About Sheep

This is a fat man with a useless hammer.


The devil sheep wants to be with the other sheep, but the other sheep are afraid of the devil sheep.


But those sheep will get theirs in the end (this one is for my Discerning Philistine).

Tips 'n' Notes

Did you ever try scissors? They're like 2 friendly knives, safely working in concert.

scissors. Scissors. SCISSORS!

Things I have Learned During my Apartment Search

White people looking for homes love tall things (see imaginary neighborhood "Stuyvesant Heights" and formerly imaginary neighborhood "Prospect Heights"). I am a white people, I want to live on a hill with a view.

All neighborhoods are actually Crown Heights ("Stuyvesant Heights", "Prospect Heights").

Realtors have invented most of the neighborhoods in Brooklyn. My grandma's Brooklyn has 5 neighborhoods: Crown Heights, Downtown, Willamsburg, Coney Island and Bay Ridge. This may be slightly influenced by the elderly Jewish homemaker perspective, but still.

Crown Heights is now Bed Stuy, Bed Stuy is Fort Greene, and Clinton Hill has been deleted.

Everyone I know who lives outside the city wants me to know about the 19 bedroom homestead with a pony that they rent for what I will pay for a "charming 0.3 bdrm GUT RENO crackhome on historic Rikers Island - everything is painted white!!!"

One-Upsmanship

BESTED!
This woman is the REAL champion of breastery and slapping! I doff my tits, madam.

Let's Just Have Fun Tonight!

V. Hungry Cat.